SOLSC '23 Day 11: Systems

 

It's the first day of spring break, and I'm thinking about systems, thanks to my most recent attempt at reading Atomic Habits by James Clear.  I think I've started reading this book twice before, and somehow never made it past chapter four.  Maybe because the first three chapters already have me vigorously nodding my head and thinking hard about how I do things.  And can we just give Mr Clear a huge shout-out for summarizing each chapter in bullet points?  I do most of my self-improvement reading at 430a, and my fuzzy pre-dawn brain sparks just a bit brighter when the highlights are reviewed so succinctly.

But back to systems...One of Clear's best quotes has been repeated several times in professional meetings I've attended:

“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems."

Oh, how I've harped on the value of routines this school year, how important they are in making students feel safe in a school environment, knowing what to expect each day, especially when life at home may not offer the same comfort.

I need to apply that to my own work, too.  I spent some time cleaning up my office these past few weeks, trying to combine cluttered piles into cohesive work projects (like the piles of books that need to be processed, moved to the same cart).  I've always been pretty good at managing the "storefront" end of the library, the lessons and read-alouds, materials requests and inventory and book fairs.  I need to be better at creating a system of time management that allows me to tackle the behind-the-scenes work--like processing all those books.

I need to apply this at home even more.  I need systems to deal with decluttering, exercise, money management and home-care.  I need to keep up with what works, and phase out what doesn't.  Maybe then, my spring cleaning during spring break will actually last past this season, and I really will get to retire in six years with good systems in place!

SOLSC '23 Day 10: The cramp

 

I swear I took my magnesium supplement last night, and drank eight glasses of water yesterday.  I even had a banana at lunch.

The cramp didn't care.

There I was, in that first dip of deep sleep that comes an hour after my head hits the pillow, when the outside of my left ankle spasmed into a hard, breathtakingly excruciating knot.  The pain quickly traveled up my calf before I jumped out of bed.  When this happens, it doesn't matter which way I turn my foot or leg; every movement just makes the knot worse.  Pressure from standing sometimes does the trick, but not this time.  I hobbled to the bathroom, whimpering as my calf seized up, cursing the interruption to my much-needed sleep.  

My foot now up on the toilet seat, I can feel the hard knot in my calf, and try to massage it away with a modicum of success.  The spasms stopped, but I could feel the tension still there in my ankle.  I carefully made my way back to bed, spending precious minutes of what should be sleep trying to find a position that wouldn't trigger a full-on cramp again. 

At some point I must have drifted off.  The memory of the pain was front and center as my alarm blared, exhausting and prompting another twenty minutes of sleep.  And the cramp?  Nowhere to be seen this morning.  I danced to the radio in the dim light of the living room, sending it even further away.  

You may have taken my night, cramp, but you're not ruining my day! 

SOLSC '23 Day 9: Chocolate cake for breakfast

                                                 o         o         o

                                                 l          l          l

My husband baked me a

chocolate cake for my

birthday, and since it's 

only the two of us, I've 

been eating it every day since for

breakfast

and it's

making

me 

sick now.

Like blowing out those birthday candles, I've figured out 

how to extinguish a love for chocolate cake.

SOLSC '23 Day 8: To plan, or not to plan

 

I am a planner.  I think it comes with the territory--hello, teacher planning periods?  Year-at-a-glance curricula?  Spiral reviews and testing season?  My library gig involves even more planning--book fairs, author visits, inventory.

The planning has long bled over into my personal life, too.  Paper calendars and spiral agendas are almost always at hand.  I have stickers, color coded goals, and morning routines mapped out week by week.  It doesn't take much digging into my psyche to find a hidden need to control, document, make sense of my life.  (Also a need to write something down if I have to remember it--too many drawers are open in my brain's filing cabinets most days.)  Not that I accomplish everything I set out to do, but checking off what does get done is validating.

That sense of control is false, of course.  The extremely premature birth of my firstborn three decades ago was a shocking reminder of that, one that kept me from touching any kind of planner for over a year.  Instead, I documented her medical victories in the tiniest print in her baby book that wasn't meant to accommodate an extra three months out of the womb, living day to day based on doctors' prognoses.

The planning bug didn't go away, though, especially as we added another child with more appointments to keep and two working parents' jobs to juggle.  The kitchen calendar was front and center, but so was my weekly agenda, mapped out each Sunday to make sure we got to the dentist and t-ball practice, then teacher conferences and band performances.  Getting another degree in the midst of all that necessitated homework planning, too.

The kids are now grown, so you'd think the planning has pared down.  Instead, I've gotten a bit ridiculous with it all.  I have a quarterly goal setting planner, a personalized weekly/ monthly planner, and just started a bullet journal to keep track of my healthcare journey.  (I really need to catch up in that last one.)   I thought I was simply honing my skills when I read a passage from Brene Brown's The Gifts of Imperfection that hit me so hard I had to reread it several times. She writes that instead of dealing with the discomfort and pain in life, we

"... make it go away.  We do that by numbing and taking the edge off the pain with whatever provides the quickest relief.  We can anesthetize with a whole bunch of stuff, including alcohol, drugs, food, sex, relationships, money, work, caretaking, gambling, staying busy, affairs, chaos, shopping, planning, perfectionism, constant change, and the Internet." (p.70) 

Did you catch that?  "Planning" was part of that list.  It made me start thinking about my ratio of time spent planning vs doing, the goals that I tend to repeat over and over, steps dutifully color-coded and outlined in my customized planner but never completed.  Am I just throwing seeds around hoping they'll grow, instead of doing the real work of tilling and amending the soil and getting to the roots of the whats and whys of my behavior?  

Time to do some more digging...

SOLSC '23 Day 7: It's in the cards

The circulation desk was transformed into party central yesterday.  My generous assistant continued the week-long green theme with a green plastic tablecloth, green flowers, a green birthday balloon, and a giant gift bag full of green relaxation gifts--pajamas, a robe, eye mask, and more.  And there was sliced pound cake--every flavor imaginable, enough to share with the entire campus.

My tech support teacher and instructional team treated me to lunch in the library with stories and laughter.

I couldn't have been better celebrated at work.

And then a music class came in from down the hall and sang "Happy Birthday" to me, leaving me with a stack of handmade cards.  

And another class dropped off cards.  And another.  By midday, I had a small stack of pencil and crayon drawings and birthday wishes, with the most inventive spellings of librarian. There was love in every card.

First mission accomplished.  Now to move on to changing a common message in those cards--"Thanks for letting us check out your books."  It may be my library program, but it's our library, our books, and how lucky we are to share this space and these stories together.

SOLSC '23 Day 6: Oh, okay

 

I repeat the same lines to my third through fifth grade classes during library orientation every year.  They are the recipients of this monologue because, unlike my younger readers, several become repulsed by reading as they approach or reach double digit birthdays.

"There are over twenty thousand books in this library.

No, I am not joking.  The computer counts them every year after we do inventory, and spits out the number for our final report.

You may ask me for recommendations for a good book.

You may ask me to help you find a book.

You may ask your teacher, your friends, the library assistant to hook you up with a good book.

You may NOT come up to any of us and say "There is nothing to read in this library."

I am an adult librarian, and there is no way I could read every book in this library before I die.  Nor do I want to read every book.  BUT I can ALWAYS find a book that I am interested in, or I'm willing to try out.  ALWAYS.  Because I make an effort to do so.

You have to make that same effort, too."

************************

The library is a place in school where our scholars can exercise almost complete independent agency, which is another reason it bugs me so much when they don't want to read.  I will honor a student's reading choices whether it's a favorite picture book checked out by a fifth grader (good for practicing fluency, visual literacy, and general happy feelings) or a graphic novel to a beginning reader who can only follow along with the pictures.  You want to check out only nonfiction military books?  Great--and let me show you these historical fiction accounts you might like, too.  Getting bored with novels?  How about a cookbook, instead--just be sure to make something for your teacher and the library staff.  (I've only had three students in ten years who followed those directions...sigh.)

The greatest reward I get is when I put a book into a reluctant reader's hand that they didn't expect or realize we even had, and I get an "Oh, okay." before they head to the circulation desk to check out.

SOLSC '23 Day 5: A little bit wiser...?

Another trip around the sun, another year of learning and growing.  This is the list I've come up with as I sit and ponder over this past year.

• Time in nature is essential for my well-being.  I need quiet time in a forest, by a seaside, even just driving backroads through the countryside with the sunroof open and windows cracked.
• These last few years have really knocked the playfulness out of me.  I will be actively searching for it this coming year.  I suspect creative pursuits and spending more time outdoors will be part of the antidote.
• The older I get, the better I become at listening, especially to the message under the words...but I still need to grow in that skill.
• It's okay to set boundaries and not listen sometimes, too. 
• "Everything is consequences."  A quote from The Girl Who Drank the Moon that so very aptly fits this time in my life.  Where I am at right now is a consequence of everything that has gone on before, most of it my responsibility.
• It's my responsibility to change things for better consequences in my future.
• It's important to pause and celebrate and breathe.  
• Dopamine dressing--so that's the name for what I've been doing all these years?  (And the reason for the piles of clothes I need to declutter, too...)
• Purple hair may just be my look for life.
• You are never too old for stickers and glitter nail polish.
• I need to take advantage of this thing called "summer break", and really take a break this summer.  Luckily, I have friends who are holding me accountable for this.
• Great colleagues help many any job less stressful.
• Keeping a gratitude journal is as essential to my well-being as water and sunlight.

Fifty-seven years of learning, with hopefully a few more decades ahead to keep at it!