I have found that among its other benefits,
giving liberates the soul of the giver.
--Maya Angelou
It was so easy to get caught up in online shopping last week. Without my usual work prep or hours in the library, I could and did spend hours clicking through sale emails, typing in coupon codes, perusing the piles of catalogs that arrived daily.
Without fail, at some point within each shopping excursion I found myself looking at gifts not for others, but for myself. Oooh, those shoes would go great with the sweater I just got, and now they're thirty percent off... Free shipping limits prompted the rationalization of "something for them, something for me", just to save eight or nine dollars.
I realized just how much online shopping I did when I made a list and counted the packages to be delivered--nineteen, in all.
I should feel liberated, with the pile of gifts to be given growing with every visit from the USPS, UPS, FedEx, and Amazon delivery people. Several purchases were made to support friends' small businesses, and that did feel good, buying gifts while furthering their pursuits. But that doesn't stop the twinge of guilt I feel as I open each box and realize how much is staying right here, these items that lured me in with their double-digit discounts.
This morning, I'm focusing on the moments of liberation I have experienced these past few days: giving a gift card to a stranger in need; unsubscribing from dozens of retail email lists and deleting hundreds of emails from my inbox; realizing that items I purchased for myself really aren't working out, and knowing just the right person who would enjoy them. I've joined a "clearing space" Facebook group started by a friend, and threw dozens of catalogs in the recycle bin. My New Year will bring a renewed effort to curb needless spending.
I'm feeling liberated, just thinking about it.
Your small moment reminds me of a saying - we are what we spend time doing. It seems you are setting yourself up for doing things in a different way in 2020. Liberating does seem the right word to describe your actions. Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteSally, your reply is such a good reminder. And yes, I've got "no spend" stickers ready to place on my 2020 calendar to track this new habit!
DeleteThis is a great thoughtful post and perfect for the season. I'm not much of a shopper, but I typically buy myself a lot at this time of the year. I think it's a mental thing--I'm prepared to spend, so I've already broken what I call "the spending barrier." I can, unfortunately, relate to going overboard. Those double digit discounts are so enticing!!! I really like how you're trying to change your behavior by focusing on the liberation of eliminating, rather than on the guilt of purchasing. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteMolly, I've never really thought about the "spending barrier", but it makes total sense; I tend to be an "all or nothing" shopper. I'm looking forward to the time I gain by not shopping as much!
DeleteLiberation -- you are inspiring me to de-clutter my mind as well as my house. I realize how much I am longing for that. As always, an honest, courageous post, Chris. I always admire how you see truths and shoot straight with your words.
ReplyDeleteI'm on a mission sometimes, Fran, to make sure that my posts aren't all "life is perfect"--because you and I know it's not, always. I love that you are able to communicate it via stories, whereas mine seem more like news reports!
DeleteSounds like you will be starting 2020 with both a cleaner space AND outlook on life! Best wishes!
ReplyDeleteI'm trying, Amanda; it's an ongoing struggle, but one I feel I have to overcome the older I get. I don't want to leave a messy legacy to my kids!
DeleteThe retail emails I got during Black Friday Week (Since when did Black Friday become a week long!?!?!) and Cyber Monday got out of control. It's time for me to do some unsubscribing again. It's just excessive.
ReplyDelete