It's Spiritual Journey Thursday, and Bob is asking us to think about the influence of our attitude. You can read his post here.
When I saw the prompt for this month's SJT, I immediately felt like I was entering the confession booth of the churches of my youth...
...because there was a situation where I copped an attitude at the beginning of the school year, and it has affected my working relationships with certain people. I have rarely exhibited such behavior in my professional career, and I even shocked myself.
Was my attitude warranted? After much reflecting and discussing with people I trust, the answer has been yes.
Could I have handled my frustration in a more professional manner? After much reflecting and discussing with people I trust...the answer has been maybe. We all have our limits, and I had reached mine.
I've learned a lot about my strengths and weaknesses while navigating the aftermath of my attitude.
- I am a master at compartmentalizing. My issues with some do not affect my relationships with the rest; in fact, it makes me appreciate them even more. The same goes for my work at hand; I can still strive to be a good educator with my students' best interests at heart.
- I have always had problems dealing with conflict, especially when I feel like I'm not valued by the other side. It makes me doubt my worth and the wisdom of my experience. This is not the feeling I wanted to be battling during my final year in public education.
The biggest takeaway from this year is that transparent, timely communication is my first and foremost "love language" in the workplace. I hold myself accountable for my side of this communication. I am working on losing my negative attitude, while treasuring the positive relationships at work and at home.
Chris, sometimes we are pushed to our limits and no matter how we try to rein ourselves in, we explode. Is this attitude or righteous indignation? We can and try to do our part, but when others don’t uphold their end then things happen. I think your last line provides words to live by. Bob
ReplyDeleteExactly, Bob. Doing a lot of deep breathing and letting go these days.
DeleteChris, what a great reflection on your attitude this year toward those select few. A timely topic, to be sure. Here's to a great rest of your school year, with unexpected and joyful resolution even with the difficult ones.
ReplyDeleteOh boy, Chris... I fear I can relate to this more than I might desire to "confess" (!). What I appreciate most is your reflection, re-assessing the situation and your response. Truth is that other people's negativity, unprofessionalism, insecurity, self-centeredness and downright meanness/spite can rise up like dragons to scorch us. Sometimes our response is self-defense - putting up a shield. Sometimes it's an instantaneous fighting fore with fire. I've done both in my professional and personal life. Sometimes with regret and sometimes not. Bottom line: We don't have to partake of the toxicity around us. Of course it's going to affect us from time to time and, yeah, sometimes we have to fight our way out of the vortex. Having said all that... I'm right with you in some of these same battles, and I have to tell myself my value isn't contingent on other people and their sometimes narrow and misguided perspectives. In fact, all this is but a small part of the greater story of life, even if much of our time is spent here. Therein lies the challenge. How will we rise? Only by doing our part with clear conscience - for we cannot do others' part and their consciences (attitudes?) are up to them. Your workplace love language - transparent and timely communication - is the same as mine, indeed. "I hold myself accountable for my side of this communication" - true genius, this line. I strive to do the same. Your words and honesty are so empowering - thank you. Carry on with confidence and grace, my friend!
ReplyDeleteChris, I love your honest reflection. It's hard to come to terms with our own shortcomings. But I have found it helps my attitude going forward! Thanks for sharing this.
ReplyDelete